Another Stupid Spell by Bill Ricardi

If your own intelligence was the fuel that your magic ran on, how brightly would you dare to burn?

Another stupid spell

If your own intelligence was the fuel that your magic ran on, how brightly would you dare to burn?

Sorch is an abused orc mage in a world where orcs are cursed with stupidity every time they cast a spell. As a slave to the Voodoo Engine, he was fated to live a short, unrewarding life. While foraging for food one night, Sorch stumbles upon two human mages in big trouble. He saves their lives, and in return they give him an amulet that will make his life easier. Unbeknownst to the humans, their gift grants Sorch the power to break the cycle of intelligence drain and physical abuse. With the help of his friends, Sorch becomes a real mage. He leaves his swamp and embarks on a series of incredibly exciting and dangerous adventures. During his travels he encounters horrible injury, magical treasures, love, snow, university admissions tests, a plot against the Kingdom, and then of course he saves the world. Or does he?

'Another Stupid Spell' is the first book in 'Another Stupid Trilogy', the first epic fantasy series in the world of Panos. If you like first person action and adventure, hard hitting magical combat, and rooting for an unlikely hero, then Bill Ricardi's debut novel is right up your alley.

Genre: FICTION / Fantasy / Epic

Secondary Genre: FICTION / Fantasy / General

Language: English

Keywords: High fantasy, Epic fantasy, orcs, minotaurs, werecats, humans, fantasy, magic, mages, bisexual protagonist

Word Count: 87000

Sales info:

'Another Stupid Spell' achieved multiple Amazon Top 100 slots as a paid novel, netting over £8,000 in its first year after all costs. It later became my free 'magnet' title (English language only, all translations will be normal price), achiving multiple Amazon #1 in category slots, and several Amazon Top 100 Free peaks.

It remains quite popular to this day, with hundreds of reviews on Goodreads, Amazon, and Kobo. All ratings are 4+ stars.

This book drives sales to the rest of the trilogy, the first two books in The Blackstaff Siblings (third coming out in December), and the first trilogy box set. All of those will also be available for translation, pending successful translation and marketing of the first title.

This is a first person diary of an orc. The orc's intelligence shifts throughout the book. This means that his vocabulary ranges from primitive tribal all the way up to highly intelligent magus. Translations need to be able to reflect the intelligence of the protagonist at the time, and the shift in intelligence from chapter to chapter.

Full English version available for examination on Amazon.

Sample text:

Me smart orc.

Other orc need go around and bash. Other orc need dig and farm. Other orc carry stuff and things. Not me. Me smartest kind of orc: Me use magic!

Orc live by hill in swamp. Big hills one way, muck other way. Elf trees past muck, no go there. Man town past hills, no go there. No go up, no go down, big water those ways. Me swim, but that much water silly. Orc stay where orc is, safe that way. Green skin, green muck.

Me in Jeywafa tribe. No other tribe use magic. Some use god-power, like friend Shaman. No magic. Will tell more why later. Jeywafa tribe in south muck with many other tribe. Far north, past big cold hill, them north tribe. Almost never see them. 

Live tribe life. Hard life sometimes. Gotta hunt stuff, gotta grow stuff and things. But stuff hunts us too. Humans sometimes hunt. Elves sometimes hunt if mad. Beasties hunt… evil lizards, mean apes, big rats. But we strong. Fathers and their fathers and their fathers, all strong. They fight for land, they fight and protect treasures. They keep biggest treasure super safe, so smart orc can do job.

Biggest treasure called ‘Voodoo Engine’. Stupid name. Super good treasure. Orc do magic near Voodoo Engine, it make things go. Smart orc do work of ten dumb orc. Engine mines, and digs, and chops, and farms. Engine do what Chief says. Quiet magic hands just do work for orc. That why smart orc important. Only smart orc do magic.

But big problem.

Orc who do magic get dumb. Is orc curse. Shaman say old-old orc insult elf goddess. Call her dumb. Elf goddess say, ‘We see who dumb!’ So each magic done, orc brain get tiny. Happen quick too. Orc friend do two spells, get real dumb. Walk into lizard pit next day, got eated. Chief say he better off that way. Smart orc don’t think so, but who me to say?

Book translation status:

The book is available for translation into any language except those listed below:

Already translated. Translated by Vieru Raluca Maria
Author review:
Great communication! Translated the world map as well. Sending it out to market as we speak. :)
Already translated. Translated by Carmelo Massimo Tidona
Author review:
Carmelo was knowledgeable about the process, friendly, and thorough. He even helped with the translation of the fantasy map and checked details like the translated cover! :)

If the market likes this one, I'll be offering all six books in the series to Carmelo for translation, with the confidence that he'll get the job done.

Would you like to translate this book? Make an offer to the Rights Holder!