Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Henry Cloud and John Townsend- Book Summary - Readtrepreneur
(Disclaimer: This is NOT the original book, but an unofficial summary.)
Many of us misunderstand that saying no is bad and as a result, we say yes to far too many responsibilities, even those that are not ours. This book Boundaries discusses how to set up our own boundaries, the importance of it, and how to overcome the various conflicts that come with boundaries. We will learn that everyone needs boundaries of their own and we must learn to respect the boundaries of others.
(Note: This summary is wholly written and published by Readtrepreneur. It is not affiliated with the original author in any way)
"One of the most expensive things you could ever do is pay attention to the wrong people." - Dr. Henry Cloud
Some of us may be compliants, always conforming to the requests of others; while some of us may be the one overstepping the boundaries of others, intentionally or not. Setting up boundaries and staying firm may not be easy, but it will make you a happier, more fulfilled person in the long run.
P.S. Learn how to improve your own life tremendously when you understand the true meaning behind setting boundaries for yourself and learning how to say no, or when to say yes.
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Chapter 1. Optimal Stopping – When to Stop Looking
One thing that makes life difficult is not knowing when to stop – this has been labeled as the Optimal Stopping Problem. There is a danger of quitting too early and missing out on something good, or quitting too late and exhausting the little energy and time that we have.
Thankfully, there is an algorithm that will make decisions much easier. It’s not entirely foolproof, but it will produce better outcomes than doing things randomly.
The Optimal Stopping Problem deals not with what option to select but how many choices to consider. Based on statistical data, the ideal percentage is 37%.
The Secretary Problem explores the idea of Optimal Stopping. Someone tasked to hire a secretary has to choose among applicants, but he must know when to stop so that he will not miss someone who is good for the job.
In looking for the secretary, stopping late means prolonging the choice unnecessarily, while stopping too early lets the best applicant go unhired. The strategy is to find a reasonable balance between the two conditions.
Already translated. Translated by Elizabeth Garay